High-Functioning Anxiety by Dr. Lalitaa Suglani (Book Review: 4*/5) !!!

  

17^th Book of 2024

We have found many articles and stories asking us to concentrate more upon our mental health and give it priority just like we give to our physical health. Unfortunately, not many institutions/public figures walk the talk. I am glad that one of the publication houses I follow, Hay House India, regularly publishes books which are based upon the topics related to our mental health. I read their previous book which was about self-love and this time, I read a book which is about anxiety. “High functioning anxiety” is written by Dr. Lalitaa Suglani in around 225 pages which also comes up with the tagline- “A 5-step guide to calming the inner panic and thriving”.

 

Lalitaa introduces us to the concept of High functioning anxiety which is not like regular anxiety but a different purview wherein people experience anxiety while still being able to function well in their daily lives. People with high-functioning anxiety may appear successful and well-accomplished, but they may also be struggling with internal feelings of stress, self-doubt, and fear. This made me curious to read further as most of us go through such phase where we process normally but we always feel anxious within.

 

The initial chapters are a different experience to read as author introduces us with various types of HFAs wherein she explains how some childhood experiences and treatments transform a certain kind of our attitude which starts defining our personality. The chapters help us relate with several types as we can associate them with us. Author also clarifies that we can be completely one of them or a combination of multiple types. In further chapters, she tries to mix up two HFA types and explains how we might be struggling with such personality traits. These writings help us understand the concepts well and evaluate how we have been processing ourselves until now.

 

In one of the sections, Lalitaa explains Maslow’s hierarchy of needs in such a way that even after knowing about it previously, it felt like knowing it in an easier and better way. Author highlights upon the fact how we are always striving to please people and become favourites by killing our inner desires. She throws upon the light to the fact that we should be concentrating upon our real self and lead the path to self-awareness.

 

Author has nicely divided the 5 chapters where she concentrates on each of the 5 steps before moving on to the next. Each chapter consists of case studies, author’s personal experiences, self-reflection questions for us, setting the boundary section etc. which helps us understand the topics rather than just reading blindly. There’s one concept of the “Wheel of Life” in the latter part of the book which nicely divides our life in different sections and help us understand how to give weightage and priority to each of them than missing one of these important elements of life.

 

In the end, author ends the book giving us few reference points to follow in order to overcome the High functioning anxiety. Reading the last step and chapter gives a relief as mostly the book is about the problems thriving within us whereas the last pages give us positivity and hope that we can push ourselves out of this zone.

 

Talking about the drawbacks, I must say that author has explained each concept a lot which could have been summed up in a better way by reducing the length of each chapter. The case studies and examples used are repetitive which starts becoming a painful experience to read time and again. The chapters have so many sections and their respective sub-sections that I have ended up missing the flow couple of times. Author could have structured the sections within the chapters in a better manner.

 

Overall, this book is insightful and helps us understand how we can treat the anxiety within us which is gradually taking us towards mental health issues. I would give this book 4 stars out of 5.

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WRITING BUDDHA

Time to Come Home by Damini Grover (Book Review: 4.5*/5) !!!

  

16^th Book of 2024

There are many self-help books which tells us about multiple things to fix which ends up being ineffective as we tend to forget most of the pointers. There are rarely any books which focus on one aspect of many things we need to do which can itself help us solve many critical issues we are facing in our life. There’s one such book which happened to be beneficial in this aspect which I have just completed reading – “Time To Come Home” written by Damini Grover. This book published by Hay House India in around 275-pages also has a tagline- “Sowing the Seeds of Self-Love for Lasting Happiness”.

 

As the tagline is self-explanatory, the book talks about the benefits of bringing in the aspect and quality of self-love in our attitude and daily lives to ensure that we give prominence to ourselves before anyone else. Damini just doesn’t pick self-love out of many qualities that we must possess to chase happiness. She starts the book by helping the readers understand why self-love is important and how we end up becoming a confused and lost personality by keeping ourselves last in the last of our priority list always.

 

Damini’s writing skill is such that it made me tough to believe that the book has been executed by an Indian author. She has a writing style which is global that makes it relatable for readers across the world. She has chosen very friendly language to make us delve into the concept and apply it in our lives. She is a counselling psychologist herself but doesn’t complicate things by adding jargons related to several theories and chemical reactions happening within us. She keeps things simple to help readers understand how they can understand the missing patterns in their behaviour and start correcting them gradually to achieve long-lasting happiness.

 

Damini takes the readers through the journey in a manner that it never bores you. She has included many conversations between a psychologist and the person seeking therapy which helps us understand the mindset of the victim and relate with it. We tend to understand how we are also facing issues that one of these communicators are. It helps us concentrate more in these sections where we find things which signifies our own status quo. Similarly, there are many stories/incidents mentioned by the authoress that helps us understand the concepts well.

 

Rather than just providing theoretical insights, Damini also includes written exercises after important chapters that helps us recollect our thoughts and revaluate our approach and provide answers as to how we are going to improve those aspects immediately. These exercises are mind-juggling and helps us get into the groove and apply the actionable. It provides us the clear path to walk upon to achieve the ever-aspiring happiness.

 

There is a section where authoress mentions how even after knowing everything and being certified psychologist, even she falls into this trap now and then but she makes regular habit to get out of it by following the mentioned steps. She helps us understand how we need to treat a lot of personality issues that we have acquired from our childhood and experiences. She throws light on concepts such as reparenting where we need to nurture values again in our core system in a new way to lead a better life. She introduces us with concepts on how we can embrace gratitude and forgiveness, follow affirmations rightly, cultivate the art of authenticity and follow the journey even after achieving the goal.

 

Overall, this is a great book which is enough interesting for you to finish in few sittings yet I would suggest to go slow to grasp the beauty of it. I give this book 4.5* out of 5.

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WRITING BUDDHA

Aunties of Vasant Kunj by Anuradha Marwah (Book Review: 4*/5) !!!

  

15^th Book of 2024

Fiction is my favorite yet somehow; I always get into non-fiction but I regularly miss it even when non-fiction provides me the comfort it does when the days aren’t going well. Luckily, I got my hands upon a wonderful fiction this time named “Aunties of Vasant Kunj” written by Anuradha Marwah. This 300-pages book published by Rupa Publications is author’s 4^th release and her experience is evident in every paragraph. Talking about the cover page first, the way the designer has captured the essence of all the characters in the book by embedding related accessories is a witty work indeed.

 

Author has very nicely crafted the book which is based in a six-months’ time-frame describing the lives of three different female energies where each of them are different from the other two. Keeping Shailaja as the main protagonist, Anuradha ensures that she still gives equal importance to Nilima and Dini. Writing a book on 3 characters where each one of them have their own space is something which has been nicely handled. The way their background is provided through story-telling makes the reader understand and visualize each one of them quite clearly.

 

Anuradha has also based the characters in similar conditions but deriving from different types of situations. At one point, authoress makes it clear to us that all three have been derived out of her own life experiences which makes it even more interesting in terms on how she has broken down her tale in three different parallel stories. I enjoyed reading their individual lives in the beginning and the process in which all three of them meet each other.

 

The arc through which all the characters travel engages us throughout the story and we want to see how they move further. Definitely, most of the turns that comes in the story are predictable and old but yet the narration keeps you hooked. Not only the main characters but authoress tries to keep even the other supporting characters say something important. They are not there just to fill the spot. Either the maid, mother-in-law or daughter – everyone has something particular to say through their conversations with the main characters.

 

Written by a female based on all the female characters gives an impression that the book shall be pro-woke-feminism but thankfully, it is not so. The characters are flawed and even if their ego doesn’t let them believe it, authoress speaks it boldly to the reader. Even when Dini’s character is itself one of women activist’s yet you won’t get uncomfortable reading it because other characters around her makes her realize that this is not how it works in practical life. Sections of the book speaks on the role of father in children life, proper closure in relationship from both the ends, not going ahead with court cases against men just for the sake of it etc. I am glad authoress chose this path rather than making the book impressionable only to the woke generation.

 

We are generally habitual of reading books based on girls who are in their 20s or early 30s but here, we get an insight on how the lifestyle of women in their 40s must be. It is wonderful reading the way they have to deal with relationships, job, divorces, marriage, in-laws, kids, neighborhood, societies, judgment etc. There’s a section where two characters lose their job at the same time and the way the same scenario is treated differently and the different lessons provided with the respective cases is phenomenal. Similarly, the challenges faced by a homemaker is also given deserving prominence in the book.

 

There’s a large part of the book where Buddhism is discussed and even when it consists of humorous sections, Anuradha has ensured that she doesn’t end up disrespecting the religion in any manner. She has handled it with maturity. Similarly, she ensures that if she has mentioned a locale in the title of the book- Vasant Kunj, she makes it informative for the readers to understand how is the life in such areas where people fight for water issues and electricity usage every morning and night. Anuradha has used her wit and sense of humor to make it a funny and engaging read throughout. The only issue I have is with the length of the book. It could have been down by 50 pages easily.

 

Overall, this is an interesting read which you’ll enjoy with smile and laughs in between. I give the book 4 stars out of 5.

 

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WRITING BUDDHA